sold

today was the day i had to REALLY say goodbye to Peyton's crib. it was hard. i put it on craigslist a few days ago, and i knew once i posted it, it would sell fast. (it's a beautiful white sleigh crib. perfect, and exactly what i wanted for our first baby). it killed me to sell it, but also was killing me to see it in the garage day after day waiting for a baby to sleep in it again.

everyday we went outside to play, we would pass by it. the first few days the crib was in the garage Peyton would stop to look at it and touch it, or even climb on it like he did the last few weeks it was in his room. but as days went by, the less interesting it became to him. finally he just totally forgot about it. me.... not so much. EVERY SINGLE TIME i passed it my heart broke and i would think about my baby. my first tiny baby boy. all the naps, all of the night wakings & helping him soothe himself back to sleep, and the first time he (finally) slept through the night. he was 8 weeks old. eight weeks may not seem like a long time to wait to get a good night sleep, but to two parents who had NO IDEA that newborns didn't sleep (why no one told us that, i have no idea) it was the best night sleep we EVER had. and of course, the first time i caught Peyton standing in his crib was priceless. he was 8 months old. May 1st, 2006. (yes, i remember the exact day). i went into his room to get him from his afternoon nap, and there he was, standing like a big boy, holding onto the side and smiling like 'HEY LOOK AT ME MOM!' he was SO proud of himself. i was too. so basically it took me a couple of weeks to actually POST his crib on craigslist. i guess i had to do my own farewell to it by seeing it look empty and sad in our garage. and just as i thought, once i posted it on craigslist, the emails came fast. we had at least 10 emails the first day. i read through all of them, picked one and hoped it would all be over soon. the girl came this morning to pick it up. my first thought was i WAS NOT going to be here when she came. i was going to let Jason deal with 'selling' it. but once she got here and i heard her in my house, i panicked a little and wanted to meet her. i guess a part of me wanted to make sure i was giving the (best crib ever) to someone i liked and who deserved it. i don't know what i would have done if i didn't like her. (crib? what crib? there's no crib here!) but she was nice. she had a newborn (girl) who needed a crib. she was sweet. lives in Keller. and on her way out she said she would take good care of it. so.... that is that.... it's gone.... my 'baby' is 3.5 years old and sleeps in a big boy bed now.... today i even heard him say 'i sleep in a big boy bed now, the lady came and took my crib. i don't need it anymore.'and just like that.... the crib is gone.

i would be lying if i said i didn't cry. i did.
twice.